The summer at the Pitre house was pretty quiet this year. Aside from Bruce and Benjamin spending a week in North Georgia at boy scout camp, we stayed pretty close to home. We stayed busy with work, some projects, some overnights trips to visit and help my Mom in Orlando who recently moved to a new apartment, and my band had a pretty busy gig schedule.
But before we knew it, it was time to get ready for Sean to start 9th grade… high school, and Benjamin is now in 10th grade!
left: Benjamin and Sean kicking off kindergarten, and right: Sean (9th grade) and Benjamin (10th grade)
We call ourselves the “FINAL FOUR” … the last two kids teenaged kids and their parents, and lately the final four have been enjoying the spring weather here in Northeast Florida before the HOT arrives, and we know it will!
We didn’t go out of town for the kids’ spring break from school, but enjoyed hiking our local Jacksonville Arboritum, cycling with Ben’s boy scout troop, and attending Sean’s school’s annual spring carnival.
And before we knew it, the celebration of Easter had arrived!
I hope you and your family have been enjoying the spring of 2023. We’ve rounded the final bend of the school year and take the home stretch to summer break!
Soaking in our beautiful Jacksonville Arboritum, April 2023Benjamin, 15, earning cycling merit badge with his scouts troop, April 2023Sean, 15, standing next to the poster for the Spring Carnival that he designed, April 2023They may not be little kids anymore, but they still love decorating Easter eggs! April 2023Our church’s beautiful Easter Vigil Mass that included Baptisms, Confirmations and first Holy Communion for many new Christians. He is Gloriously Risen, Alleluia!Gorgeous Easter eggs, created by Pitre kidsYeager, our Erin’s pup wishing everyone a Happy Easter!
There comes a time when we realize how fast our children are growing, and at the same time we realize how quickly our parents are aging. We find ourselves transitioning from our dependency on our parents (and you know how much we lean on them long after we’ve moved out and start our own families) to now worrying about them. We start to notice that they are slowing down, that they aren’t as energetic as in years past. They may be starting to lean on us as the roles now have reversed.
It is at this point that we are concerned for both the daily well-being and needs of our growing children AS WELL as our aging parents. We check in with Mom to find out how the last doctor’s appointment went for her more so than we would to let her know how our appointment went.
We are now sandwiched as care-givers for the generations below AND above us. Welcome to the sandwich generation.
Some of you who know our family’s history will recall that my husband Bruce’s Dad Royce Pitre was diagnosed with lung cancer from asbestos exposure (akin to mesothelioma) back in early 2003. In the summer of 2004, Royce passed on. In the late fall of 2012, my Dad, Cliff Circe was diagnosed with bladder cancer (due to decades as a cigarette smoker) and passed in early December 2012.
Where Bruce’s Mom, Sylvia never married again, my mom Virginia (Gigi) remarried in the summer of 2013. We all love Jim, and I lovingly refer to him as my StepDad. In the last 18 months or so, during all of this pandemic psyop, our 3 living parents (all now in their early 80s) have had a really hard time, and we’re very aware of their ages. Although before the pandemic, we all spent time together often as our family, the pandemic dictated that we become and remain careful not to risk virus exposure to our elderly loved ones. But due to increasing health problems, I’ve taken many trips to visit my Mom and Jim, and we’ve visited Bruce’s family in Louisiana as much as possible, much of which visiting was due to the activities related to the wedding of our daughter Kathryn during the summer and fall of 2021.
My Mom and StepDad with our daughter Kathryn, and Bruce and I (right) at last dance at JU, 2018
It was during this family wedding trip in Tucson when my mother-in-law Sylvia fell, badly injured our left shoulder, and then needed a full shoulder replacement before she could return to Houma, Louisiana. After her surgery, her transportation home with family members, and the start of her recovery, I flew to Louisiana to stay with Sylvia. She’s lived alone since her husband’s passing, but many family members live nearby, I knew I could help her rehabilitate due to my clinical training in physical therapy as a manual therapist. I offered my help to assist her while she rested during the important healing process prior to the start of her physical therapy plan of care several weeks away. The other family members who live there in town with Sylvia all work full-time jobs. Initially they created a rotation of care-givers who would stay overnight with her in the early weeks after her surgery, but it was a hard schedule to sustain. Because I can work my graphic design business, write music and coordinate music events straight from my laptop, I had the ability to move in with Sylvia for several weeks knowing that Bruce could handle our home and family in Jacksonville without me for a while. I was able to care for her, cook, clean, grocery shop and drive her to appointments.
Meanwhile back in central Florida, my step Dad’s diabetes and COPD became increasingly severe following a heart attack he suffered shortly after having his gall bladder removed in November of 2020. Eventually, his failing health has put him under hospice home care as needed. My mom’s physical health is ok, but it’s been very taxing on her to care for her declining husband.
After visiting Houma this past early July 2022, I was at my parent’s home in western Orlando, for a weekend when I received a text message from my sister-in-law in Louisiana that they had taken Sylvia to the ER because she had fallen in her home. She had broken her right wrist and needed surgery to place a stabilizing plate. I asked if she wouldn’t mind having me come back once the surgery was done so I could help her as I had last fall, and she welcomed me back. This time I drove to Louisiana and stayed about 10 days so I could cook, clean, drive her to appointments and keep her company. After leaving, the other family members needed to come and help daily to make sure she was doing okay. She was weak and unsteady from pain medication and residual effects of anesthesia, and while I was there, she had a bad reaction to some medication and back to the ER we went. Her sleep patterns were backwards so I didn’t get much sleep while staying there. I returned home to Jacksonville exhausted but ready to pop back into my role as mom caring for my own family’s needs.
So, I’m back at home, but I keep my suitcase nearby in case I need to drive to stay with my Mom in Orlando or drive back to Louisiana. At the same time, I still have a 9th grader, an 8 grader and one in his last year of college. Six of us still are under our roof … just a lot going on!
We’ve had some family discussions and have decided to have Sylvia visited daily by their local Council on Aging organization. They offer free services from meals-on-wheels to help with appointment transportation. We hope that she’ll regain her strength and go back to being as independent as she always has been, but with each passing year, and with each injury set back, it’s becoming harder to recapture her confidence, her stability and self-reliance.
My mom is so grateful for their hospice system there in Orlando. The nurses and aides are wonderful, and help with medication and with Jim’s growing personal needs such as dressing and bathing. They also offer respite time where he stays in a close-by nursing care facility so Mom can have a few days to rest, focus on herself and their home, and to get some errands done.
There are many resources if you know who and where to ask.
Here are a couple of articles that I found that explain the experiences many of us are living right now.
I’ll keep everyone posted on our family as always. It’s difficult to face the mortality of our parents, but this is life and these times give us opportunities to return the love and care that our parents gave us throughout our lives. I can never thank our parents enough for all of their support, love and help during challenging times for me, especially their help when our 3 different sets of twins were all newborns.
Are any of my readers going through a similar experience? It actually feels like another season of life, this sandwich phase. I’d love your feedback!
So please forgive me for a post that has nothing specifically to do with parenting multiples, but it does have to do with raising kids who grow to understand that their parents’ lives are continuing just as their lives continue to move along, progress, and present new experiences and the realization of goals and dreams.
In March of this year (2022) I learned of a music organization called the Josie Music Association. Now in it’s 8th year, this association has grown by leaps and bounds both in its recognition in the independent music artists community worldwide due to their annual awards program, but also in their credibility and legitimacy in the global professional music industry.
A music PR and promotions representative here in Jacksonville asked if he could submit some of my published/released music the JMA for award consideration. I was honored to be asked and I was excited at the possibility that recognition could be an affirmation of so many years of very hard work, and of dreams that had started in my childhood.
Well, my 2nd album was submitted having met the time deadline for submission, and one of my recently released singles was submitted as well.
On May 5th a live stream announcement event was held for those artists who’d had material submitted. We were invited to log on and listen for the possibility of hearing our names announced as nominees.
Now, from what the association representatives reported, there were 52,422 music and artist submissions from all over the world. I thought, “the odds are certainly not in my favor, but the honor of having material submitted for consideration was a pretty cool experience. I can try again next year!”
But then as the category for “Pop Album of the Year” was announced and the nominees were read… MY NAME WAS ANNOUNCED! I’ve received a nomination for my original album entitled: “Follow Your Dreams”! Needless to say,I was in shock!
When the category for “Pop Single of the Year” was announced, my heart was still pounding as I listened to the list of names being announced. And then I heard that my single entitled; “My Cool Drink of Water” has been nominated!
So honored, so incredibly excited.
The concluding announcement had my heart beating even faster: The official JMA Awards Ceremony will be held in Nashville, TN at the Grand Ole Opry House where countless greats have graced the stage over the years, on Sunday evening, October 23rd, 2022.
Well, we’re going! Just Bruce and I. But our kids are ABSOLUTLELY THRILLED about this news! Part of their excitement is that ALL SIX KIDS sang and recorded on one of the nominated album’s songs entitled: “Just Like That”.
I’m honored, humbled and excited beyond words. Bruce and I are so looking forward to driving up to Nashville in October for the awards show, complete with red carpet media entrance! Being nominated alone is amazing and is the ultimate affirmation of the recognition of the quality of our music. I’m so very blessed to work with a team of such incredibly talented co-writers, co-producers and sound engineer.
After a full year of spiritual growth and preparation, our youngest boys Sean and Benjamin were Confirmed on Saturday evening, April 23, 2022: their formal, personal confirming of their faith in Jesus Christ, receiving the gifts of the Holy Spirit, and embracing our Catholic faith as young adults in the church.
l to r: Benjamin, Bishop of Diocese of St. Augustine Phillipe Estevez, Sean and Fran’s brother, Fr. Scott CirceSean making his Confirmation with sponsor Brandon supporting him.Benjamin making his Confirmation and receiving blessings while Fran’s brother Cliff Circe supports Ben.Our boys and their proud Dad and Momma!l to r: Bruce, Erin, Fran’s sister-in-law Patty Circe, Fran’s brother Cliff Circe, Fran, Sean, Brandon, Benjamin, Fran’s brother Scott Circe and Lauren
We’re so proud of our young men, and also proud of our son Brandon for being Sean’s sponsor, and my brother Cliff Circe for being Benjamin’s sponsor. We also thank my sister-in-law Patty Circe for celebrating with us, and very special thanks to my brother Fr. Scott Circe who concelebrated this very special Mass of Confirmation candidates which included his nephews, one being his Godson, Benjamin.
I don’t want to say much, but we’re heartbroken by the loss of our boy pup, our Italian Greyhound, Simon. We welcomed Simon into our family on Dec 1, 2011 after he’d just turned 5. Our youngest twins (Sean and Ben) had recently turned 4. .
He chose then 11-yr-old Erin as his girl, his number 1, but as soon as she went to school the next day, I became his number 2. I was his mom, and he was Erin’s best friend. He’s been with us through thick and thin, gone on thousands of walks and many car rides (although he really wasn’t a fan of car rides), knew all of my dreams and secrets from our long talks during long walks, he was Erin’s shadow when she was home, and he was mine when she wasn’t.
Our boys Sean and Ben at age 4, under the protection of our Italian Greyhound, Simon.
He stood behind me in the kitchen for any and all treats or nibbles that happen to fall or were offered to his awaiting mouth. He loved lettuce, bell pepper, a variety of fruit, rotisserie chicken, but his favorites were pot roast trimmings and apples!
Our boy in his red bandana and a smile.
We love you and we will miss you forever, Simon. Thank you for giving us nearly twelve years of unconditional love!
Not long after the start of the brand new year, my band had a great gig at a local venue where we normally play outside on a covered patio with a boat marina back drop, however, on January 14th, with temps in the upper 30s, we opted to set up our band equipment inside. We had a great evening with lots of friends who came out to join and support us.
I started to feel sick about 5 days later. I took a home cov test which came back positive so I stayed in my room to hole up as I had done last summer when I had symptoms, but go out to get tested. This time, I felt like I had the flu. Fever, headache, body aches, nausea, diarrhea, congested upper respiratory cough and nasal congestion and fatigue. The flu (aka cov19) lasted about two weeks and the fatigue lasted another two. By late Feb, I was fine again, and so was Bruce. His symptoms were body aches and fatigue (and a minor dry cough). I was glad he hadn’t felt as bad as I did to begin with.
When my stomach symptoms eased up, I was able to start taking some medication that I was confident would help me recover quickly. It was the same medication I was able to secure for Erin when she was sick last summer, but which were DENIED when my son was very ill the year before. I contacted America’s Frontline Doctorsonline who offered telephone appointments and called in prescriptions for HcQ (the forbidden yet tried-and-true successful therapeutic) plus a course of antibiotics to prevent any infections, all for a reasonable fee, and worth every cent. I am a life-long asthmatic, but I never became very sick. I’m so thankful for AFD!
By March 5th, I was performing on all cylinders with my band again, and we all crushed a four-hour gig!
Fran Pitre & Class Act, MaviJax, Jacksonville Beach 3/5/22 …. kickin it into gear!
I realize that Bruce and I were blessed not to have terrible cases of cov19. I do know that it’s real, have always taken it seriously, and I’ve lost more than one friend to the illness and also to the injection. I don’t have the answers, but my number one priority is the care and safety of my family. I will protect my children at all costs.
Most importantly, I continue to pray and look up to our Lord knowing that HE has the answers, and that He “is the WAY, the TRUTH and the LIFE” … John 14:6.
After we were home from our trip to Tuscon for our daughter’s wedding for a couple of weeks, I realized that I needed to take another trip. We’d checked almost daily on Sylvia and with the rest of the Louisiana family to see how things were going with her. She was home, sleeping in a recliner, but wouldn’t be released for any physical therapy until she was 6 weeks post op.
I began to think. Unlike my in-laws in Louisiana who work full time and having been taking turns staying overnight with Sylvia to assist her as needed, I don’t presently work outside of my home. I work many different jobs, but all are flexible and essentially from my laptop and I have children who don’t need me as much as they used to. I’m also trained in manual therapy and I know how to care for post operative shoulder patients. So, after talking with Bruce, we decided that I would go and live with Sylvia for about a month. I could take care of her, oversee her exercises, cook, grocery shop, do laundry and house work. I could also fill her freezer with meals that could last an additional month or more after I leave.
When I arrived to a very appreciative Sylvia, I noticed that the navel orange tree branches on the side yard were reaching the ground heavy with incredible oranges … I absolutely love oranges.
God knows how very much I absolutely love these … the most flavorful, fresh, juicy, sweet oranges I’ve ever had.
Sylvia slowly healed and we prepared for her to eventually be under the care of physical therapists. In the meantime, I helped her dress, wash and dry her hair, and encouraged her to slowly regain confidence in her left arm and get quite acquainted with her brand new shoulder joint. I took care of my mother-in-law, and it was about time the tables were turned. She had moved in with us after the births of all of our twins so she could help us with all of the needs of our house and help take care of our older children needs so I could focus on myself and my newborns. I knew I could be of much-needed assistance and more support. Feeling needed is a gift in and of itself.
During my weeks in Houma, Louisiana, Sylvia and I talked about everything, laughed about a lot, watched countless movies, enjoyed Thanksgiving at my niece’s home (so strange not being with my own family, but I was with family just the same), and ate way too much ice cream. Slowly, Sylvia began to regain her strength, her stamina and her desire to get back into life. She accepted an invitation to be picked up by a friend so she could go to a sorority meeting that she’s been a member of for decades, and I went along. I was honored to spend time with ladies that she’s spent time with over the years.
We enjoyed dozens of oranges and when the time came for me to return home, I took a few with me. But before I left, she had her first two appointments with her physical therapist. I asked lots of questions and was assured that she was in excellent hands.
I got home and was happy to reunite with my family, just in time to start planning Christmas. Christmas this year would be a quiet one after all of the traveling and excitement of the past fall.
A song that I’d written and recorded between our return from AZ and my trip to LA was finalized, mixed and mastered in our recording studio in Jacksonville while I was out of town. On December 15th, I released “My Cool Drink of Water” a melodic and lyrical expression of my appreciation of God during these challenging and confusing times. It was the official start of the 3rd album Kenny and I will be working on in 2022.
We did indeed have a very blessed Christmas, and prayed very hard for a new year free of the challenges we’d had during the last two.
